Have you ever been so focused on your career that you’re powering through late nights, skipping workouts, and eating out more than desired? Or perhaps you started dating someone new and lost touch with friends? We’ve all loosened the reins in certain areas of life to focus elsewhere. While the idea of “perfect” balance is unattainable (or ideal), as humans, we become so hyper focused in certain areas that we forget to pause and consider where we are out of balance. Or more importantly, are we curating the life that we desire?

Chris and I just completed an exercise called the “Wheel of Life” for the third year in a row. He brought it up to me after learning about it in a Tony Robbins podcast. The tool is commonly used by professional coaches. Chris and I turned it into a couples version to help us communicate about where we are happy and where we want more focus.

The end result is a visual helicopter view of key areas of your life. It typically covers eight key areas including romance, friends, career, and finances. (Side Note: It’s fine to not desire an emphasis in certain areas as well). Here is an example below. Don’t get excited because I entered false data.

To turn it into a couples session, we both record our answers then talk though each category. We switch back and forth between who talks first. We say how we ranked the area and why. Then we talk about whether we are satisfied or want to work on a particular area.

The first time we did the Wheel of Life, we both realized we were missing being a couple away from our precious sweet 8 month old. Enter our scheduled date nights and prioritizing finding a trustworthy sitter! This time around my “fun” category was miserably low. I didn’t realize how impacted this area of my life was due to the pandemic. Fun for me is exploring a new restaurant or local attraction. Its getting out of the house with plans. We are going to make an effort to fold more of this into our lives.

This exercise takes your head out of the day-to-day and allows you to reflect on whether you are happy with key areas of your life. There are plenty of free online versions but here is a simple one we really like. I hope this exercise helps you think deeper about your happiness and well-being!